Monday, July 7, 2014

Wait, what year is it ?

Hey guys!
yes it's me. Yesenia.
 How long has it been ? I feel like I have a whole bunch of stuff to catch you guys up on but we'll just start off with basic updates.

Natalia is now 3! How did that happen ? For her third birthday we surprised her with a Disneyland trip. The kid LOVED it. We're now planning on getting annual passes. That's my girl, loves her Disney just like her mama. Lol
She talks non stop and her favorite thing to say right now is "oh my god" she's such a little sassy girl and we know she's going to be trouble when she gets to her teenage years. over all she is such a sweet and smart little girl. Very, friendly, very outing, very happy, Loves dancing and overall a VERY healthy little girl

In December of 2013 Me, Jonathan and Natalia took a trip to Nicaragua so natty could meet the rest of Jonathan's side of his/her family. We really loved it down there unfortunately i spend the first week over there sick as a dog. The second week was much better. Natalia got to spend time with her grandma, great grandma , and meet her great great grandma! How cool! This whole trip is going to be another post but i'm just trying to update.

On October of 2013 we found out my brother had advanced non Hodgkin lymphoma. He began treatment later that month and I took on the roll of managing his care. Making appointments, taking him to and from appointments, filling out medical leave papers, etc. The day we were leaving for nicaragua we took him for a PICC line change, turns out he had a infection in his gum and had to stay in the hospital. It was a tough year but I am happy to see chemo worked and as of may he went into remission. He has a follow up pet scan July 27th but so far so good *fingers crossed*

As for me.....
I am still working/being a stay at home mom sort of. You see as I explained before Natty is able to be at work with me which has been a huge blessing to see her grow and be there for her, not miss a thing but it's time for her to start some type of preschool or day care. So she will be going to J's aunts day care 2-3 days a week . She is eager to learn and go to school.

Back to me. It has now been one full year since I have been off my depression meds and off two other meds. How did i manage to do that ? well Jonathan joined a gym and to support him i joined too. Little did i know how much joining that gym would change my life. I have found a healthy way to let out all the anger I feel out. After josh I had and still do have a lot of anger towards life and towards myself, But lifting weights, the gym has helped with all those feelings. I love waking  up early and knowing i'm in control of my body and what it's going to do that morning. Lifting weights, working out is more than just exsircing  for me. Its taking my power back. Its taking my power from my body back, I hated my body after having Josh, It didn't do what it was meant to do but at the gym I'M in control. it has helped as therapy and the results are just a bonus. 

I wish I could post everything else I want to update but the problem is as of right now we only have one laptop which Jonathan uses at work. He is using mine because his $2,300  gamer laptop got stolen. just our luck right ?  I'm working on buying myself a laptop that would i would use just to upload pictures and blog. I MISS BLOGGING SO MUCH!

There's so much more i want to write about but i guess this will do for now.
Here are some random pictures from the past couple of months going back to some pictures from our trip to Nicaragua. I hope to get my laptop soon because there's so much I have to write about joshy and my grief but that's going to be a long post so for now. I leave you with these.


  1. See, here is the perfect reason to get that camera back out! Write down those thoughts. Maybe I should try a gym for myself as well. Read all of your posts, and just wanted to say that I love you, momma. You are such a strength and inspiration. I think of Joshy every time Elisa has a birthday. While not in the same way, just know he was one who had (and still has) a very special spot in my heart being another October 29 weeker in 2009. Many many hugs to you.

    1. Hey, I have a reader! Thanks Lisa, funny you mention about the 29weeker October babies. That has been in my head since bod passed. Don't know why. You're right, another reason to bring the camera out. I miss blogging but it's hard with one laptop, I wrote this post at like 1:30 because my ambien never kicked in, looking back at it the grammar and spelling horrible! But who cares, right at least I wrote!